MODERATION WITH CELEBRATIONS: THE IMPACT OF ALCOHOL IN RELATIONSHIPS

The Fourth of July has finally arrived. As a result, there are parties abound; days off work, family gatherings, fireworks flying, delightful foods, and of course…alcohol flowing.

As with many holidays, this seems to be the common mix for celebrations. Often, this mix can lead to a great deal of connection and fun—an opportunity for families to connect without having the weight of work on their shoulders. When done in moderation, celebrations are a great respite for many couples and families. When celebrations are not done in moderation however, they can be a recipe for disaster.

In my experience, a key culprit to tipping the tables from fun to disaster is…alcohol. It’s important to remember that alcohol lowers inhibitions. This means that some people will become more gregarious, while others will become more obnoxious, mean-spirited, and/or difficult. Either way, this often leads to many difficulties between partners (and others).

When people are drinking they tend to be less tolerant, more impatient, and more bull-headed—hardly a recipe for healthy relationships. So, if you’re planning on celebrating this holiday—or the next one—know your limits. If you choose to drink, choose to do so in moderation. Be conscious of your actions and don’t use a celebration as an excuse to cross the line; you may regret that choice once you become coherent enough to feel the consequences of it.

To help with relational celebrations, here are some tips for you:
1. Know your limit and set if before you even have the first drink. (I.e. number of drinks)
2. Stay away from any difficult subjects between you and your partner; this is a celebration, not a time to delve into deep relationship issues.
3. Agree with your partner that the goal of this celebration is to have a fun time together that leads to connection (You cannot be connected if you’re drunk and stumbling around).
4. If you have children, have an agreed upon depart time that both partners feel reasonably comfortable with and that won’t throw the kids into a melt down due to exhaustion.
5. Agree to taking time outs if things begin to heat up.

Challenge: Have a great day of celebration—with moderation. Remember to be relational and follow the tips above.