Unfortunately many people struggle to land in their relationships. What I mean by land, is they stay ambivalent about being in it and subsequently they neither work the relationship to get it better nor leave it to move on: in essence they stay in limbo. By neither committing nor leaving, they end up wasting precious years of their lives.
I found a great book about making the decision to end your relationship or work it titled: Too Good to Leave Too Bad to Stay by Mira Kirshenbaum. If you’re trapped in the endless cycle of weighing the pros and cons of staying versus going then stop that ineffective dance and get this book.
This book is a great tool to help those who truly want to…land. The author systematically asks the reader to address one question at a time (which she calls guidelines). With each answer the author tells the reader what the statistics show regarding the happiness of people who stayed in the relationship with that issue versus those who left the relationship with that issue. For example, one of her questions has to do with whether or not you genuinely like your partner (and vice versa). If the answer is no, she tells you whether you’re likely to be happier staying or going…based on other people who left/stayed with that same answer. There are thirty six guidelines that, if answered honestly, should help you out of the quagmire of should I stay or should I go?