ASK FOR NOTHING MORE THAN YOU ARE WILLING TO GIVE (Cornerstone #4)

Lead by example. If you want to be respected, listened to, and treated well, then you must respect, listen to, and treat others well. If you can’t give it, don’t ask for it.

When I was little my mother would constantly say, “Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.” As a child this didn’t sit well with me. I believed that every once in a while I had the right to do unto others as they have done unto me. I believed that if I was mean to someone in response to him/her being mean to me, then that person would get what it feels like… and naturally s/he wouldn’t do it again. Now, many years later (well, not sooo many years later), I realize how wrong I was.

I don’t have the right to ask more of people than I ask of myself, and nor do you. This is true whether we’re talking about children, spouses, friends or co-workers. If we can’t control our anger, then how can we expect our children to control theirs? If we swear at our spouses, then who are we to get indignant if they swear at us? We have the right to hold others accountable to the same rules we hold ourselves -- nothing more, nothing less. It is therefore in our best interest to insure the example we are setting is the behavior we want to receive. If it’s not, we better change our example.

Challenge: Pay attention to the example you are setting in your life. If your loved ones acted like you, would that be good or not? If not, choose a key area to work on and set a new example. If so, move on to cornerstone #5 (and pat yourself on the back for doing good work).

Comments

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