Happy 4th Of July!

The Fourth of July is here.  As a result, there are parties abound, days off work, family gatherings, fireworks flying, delightful foods, and of course…alcohol flowing.      

When drinking and partying are done in moderation, celebrations are a great respite for many couples and families.  When celebrations are not done in moderation however, it can be a recipe for disaster.  

Key culprits to tipping the tables from fun to disaster are…too much alcohol, negative feelings and unwanted company.  It’s important to remember that alcohol lowers inhibitions.  This means that some people will become more gregarious, while others will become more obnoxious, mean-spirited, and/or difficult.  Either way, this often leads to many difficulties between family members and friends. 

When people are drinking they tend to be less tolerant, more impatient, and more bull-headed—hardly a recipe for healthy relationships.  So, if you’re planning on celebrating this holiday—or the next one—know your limits.  Be smart about how much you consume, what you choose to talk about and how you interact. 

Below are some helpful tips to keep in mind for future celebrations: 

1. Have fun and keep things light.  Parties are not the time to delve into your relationship issues, struggles and upsets.  Enjoy the day and give yourself and others a respite from serious conversations. 
2. Monitor your alcohol consumption.  Alcohol lowers your inhibitions, if you don’t like a family member normally, you will like them even less when under the influence.  Be a grown up not a teenager and stay sober, respectful and keep your wits about you.
3. Avoid the extremes.  Have fun without being obnoxious or rude. Don’t be so desperate to be the life of the party that you make a fool out of yourself or others.  Similarly, don’t hide off in the corner because you don’t like other people at the party or you don’t want to be there.  Be conscious that your actions impact others and keep yourself in check.
4. Parent responsibly.  If you have children, have an agreed upon depart time or plan that both partners feel reasonably comfortable with and that won’t throw the kids into a melt down due to exhaustion. 
5. Participate don’t hide.  Be present at the party physically, spiritually and emotionally.  Don’t hide behind your cell phone, being the ideal host or parenting. Mingle, talk, play…PARTICIPATE. 

Challenge:  Have a great day of celebration—with moderation.  Remember to be relational and follow the tips above.